Who I was...who I am today...the good the bad the ugly...

by Carol
(Oxford,Pa)

13 years ago I was a driven 35 year old on the way to making my first million. Popular and happy with the entire world following behind me like a puppy on a leash!


Today I am a tired, over worked 48 year old with no friends, no career, no money, and no hope of ever being anything more than I am right at this very moment....in fact, most days all I see ahead of me is more of the same. BUT!......

I am also incredibly blessed to have been given to chance to love a bi polar child. To be taught the true meaning of unconditional love. To know that there is NOTHING I can't handle. To get up every day and KNOW I am making a real difference. One smile from my 13 year old is worth more than any million I could have made in the corporate world and worth so much more than all the friends who disappeared when things got tough.

Just when I value myself the least, her smile reminds me my worth to her is inmeasurable.

Comments for Who I was...who I am today...the good the bad the ugly...

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Oct 08, 2015
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Oct 07, 2015
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Oct 06, 2015
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Sep 08, 2015
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Mar 22, 2014
Thank you NEW
by: Jen

I find myself so lonely at times I cry. I have a friend in my next door neighbor that understands that even though I don't work, I might not have time to walk next door to say except every other month at best, but will at least try to phone her once a month. Now she is looking at moving across the country, my daughter that drives me nuts is the person I've wrapped my life around, and she's turning 16. I find myself mourning the impending loss ("empty nest"), fearful of will she be ok, we're limited income so when she turns 18 we will have to find some limited income housing type place, etc. I'm scared and lonely and angry all at once.
Thank you for helping me, instead, to put my life back into prospective. The fact that I could be mourning what I know I'll be losing states that my life isn't as bad as I make it out to be. I would not trade her for a million dollar a year job. She's been the job that one pays to have because it is so worthwhile. Thank you for reminding me of that.

Oct 15, 2012
tears rolling down my face NEW
by: Anonymous

Been so consumed,I had forgotten that I hurt for myself sometimes too.
I was a 28 yr old who had finally learned how to control my own bipolar, taking this world by the horns! Now six years later after my son was born, I am a homeschooling mother finding myself on "early on set bipolar" sites at least 35 x's per week trying to find some way to convince the doctors that my child is bipolar!
Unwilling to medicate with adhd meds (he went crazy), we are stuck until I find a doctor brave enough to accept that I "get" my child all to well.
Thank god I was blessed with bipolar, I couldn't imagine not truly understanding him because the world sure doesn't!
It is amazing how the love for another human being can transform our dreams and goals.....
I walk with you- the past,present,future,ups downs,tears,laughter,trials,tribulations- I understand.

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