Help, I am Desperate

by jamie

My son just turned 5. We also have a 3 yr old boy as well.

Shortly after my youngest was born, my oldest child "rob" started head banging, violent tantrums, night terrors, and would be mean to the baby. Well, over these past 3 years, everything has escalated extremely. "Rob" is very competitive here at home, says he hates his brother, pushes, punches, and yells at our youngest.
This is a daily occurrence. He also is hard to settle down at night, my husband or I will stay in his bed till he falls asleep, or he will panic, scream cry, and has vomited. He is a restless sleeper.
"Rob" will wake every night after 2-3 hours and come onto the couch or cry for us. The odd thing is that this behavior does not occur ANYWHERE else except here at home. His teachers say he is wonderful there, gets along great. My doctor did recommend seeing a psychologist with him.

I am so confused and I don’t know how to help him. He is very angry here at home especially more so with my husband, and when he is off work. Is there an extreme case of jealousy to both my husband and younger son? My oldest son and I used to be so close, and I feel as if he is becoming a different person now, and it scares me. He is my baby, no matter how old he gets. What is your take on this, or have other parents had some similar issues?? Please help!

Hi Jamie

Unfortunately with the information you provided me with, I can’t diagnosis your child, and even with a full history, that isn’t something I can do online. You need to get help from a trained profession who can do a thorough assessment. What you have told me here definitely suggests you need an intervention of some sort to help your child. Night terrors are associated with bipolar disorder, but they are also associated with other anxiety disorders, and if something was going on in the home to make him feel unsafe that would explain the night terrors as well. PTSD could explain night terrors as well (not that there is, but I’m saying there are many things that must be explored).

The aggression you are describing certainly could be associated with bipolar disorder, but it could also be associated with a multitude of other issues. Please follow through with finding a professional who has experience with children who you feel comfortable with.

Kristen McClure

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