3.5 Year Old Anxiety?

Question

Or son has always been a "serious kid". He was never quite the care free goofy toddler you typically see. He would analyze things and now asks lots of question of who will with him, what are we doing, where are we going, and is afraid of strangers and new situations.

We thought mild Aspergers but anxiety seems to fit pretty well and so does some of the bi-polar symptoms.

To top it off we had our 2nd child 2 months ago and he is having a hard time with that as well.

We are having a very hard time figuring out what is normal behavior given his age and the arrival of a new baby. It should be noted that his mother stayed home with him since he was born.

-Talks by himself in the morning while still in bed
-does not handle change very well (social gatherings, away from home, kids trying to play with him, etc...)
-when we moved it took a couple months for him to sleep through the night.
-has has constipation (anxiety related? fearful?)
-has been rocked to sleep since born
-teethed extremely hard (anxiety related?)
-Wife's side has history of anxiety
-does not nap, gets about 10 hours a night
-sleep is often broken up by tossing and turning etc..
-very clingy lately
-does not want to be out of sight of mom or dad, grandma ok
-doesn't seem as happy as other kids, only smiles when giggling, silly, or tickled etc...
-just starting to play with kids his age (cousins, common friends-no strange kids)
-gets frustrated easily, water on shoes can cause a meltdown.
-when upset he screams and hits, when you try to talk to him about it he yells louder.
-Very smart, great memory (sometimes scary)
-No physical issues except constipation (on Miralax)
-Plays well with cousins and close friends-not much interaction though
-likes riding lawnmower, 4 wheeler, tools, etc...

How do you determine if he is emotionally/socially developmentally delayed or if he has anxiety/bi-polar etc...? Also, should one see a psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist, or MD? What is the difference?



Answer

Dear Anonymous

This is a great question. The truth is, our diagnostic categories are not entirely accurate and certainly not specific enough to capture all these issues in 3.5 year old.

Honestly, it may be that your child is just different. It may be that your child anxiety, has sensory integration issues or is gifted. All of these issues can cause some of the impairments that you are seeing as well.

Developmental delays or autistic spectrum disorder are almost an entirely different category, so you need to find a professional that is skilled in your location of the country if you would like to have that evaluated. Similarly Bipolar disorder in young children is extremely difficult to diagnosis.

My recommendation is that you find a child psychologist who can do a psychological assessment on your child, one who specializes in young children. You may need to see several people before you hear something that resonates with you. Unfortunately this is just the state of mental health.


Good luck to you in your search for the appropriate help for your child.

Sincerely

Kristen